Not so different, after all...

You're religious! You're atheist! You're LGBTQ! You're homophobic! Your skin is a different color! You're a raving liberal! You're a fascist conservative!!!!  THEM VS US! US VS THEM!!! They're different, so they've GOT to be wrong or bad or the root of all of society's problems!!!!  

This is what we've seen and heard all around us lately. Whenever something bad happens in the world, we are SO quick to look for things in which to place the blame. Finding the reasons behind things is different from placing blame. Don't get me wrong, reasons for bad or evil actions do NOT excuse them or entitle the perpetrators to exemption from the consequences of their choices. But reasons foster understanding. Blame fosters contention.

It's contention that caught my attention the last few weeks. And in pondering the events of the last few weeks, I've come to the conclusion that we bring a lot of this contention on ourselves. "What?!?!", you might say,  "Annette, what could you possibly mean???  We're not contentious people!!!!"  And I agree...to a point. I don't think we INTEND to foster or promote contention. I think we do it by picking each other apart and separating one another based on our differences. Poking at our differences fosters divisiveness and that is where we find contention. Now, before you get mad and close this post...please understand that I am not standing on a soap box as a paragon of perfection. I am as guilty of doing this as anyone else. 

However, lately I've been thinking that maybe - just maybe...looking for common ground might be a good place to start. If you drill things down to the bare-bone-basics, we can find commonality in ALMOST every situation and person. After all, we're all fellow passengers on this beautiful rock in space!

You might ask, "Ok, Annette, you make it sound so easy. How do we do that?". Well, I'll tell you! Mind you, it's not MY solution. It came from someone much-MUCH smarter than I. He said "Love your neighbor as yourself" and "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you!" Basically, that's it. Look at, talk to, and treat your fellow travelers the way you'd like them to look at, talk to, and treat YOU! It doesn't matter if they reciprocate. You CAN'T control what choices other people make. But I guarantee that if enough of us start doing this, it will spread like a beautiful plague of love, peace, and good will.

Another kind, wise, loving man recently said in a "Time" article: 

"Each of us has inherent worth and dignity. I believe we are all children of a loving Heavenly Father. But no matter your religion or spirituality, recognizing the underlying truth beneath this belief that we all deserve dignity is liberating—it brings emotional, mental, and spiritual equilibrium—and the more you embrace it, the more your anxiety and fear about the future will decrease. Love your neighbor and treat them with compassion and respect. A century of experience has taught me this with certainty: anger never persuades, hostility never heals, and contention never leads to lasting solutions. Too much of today’s public discourse, especially online, fosters enmity instead of empathy. 

Imagine how different our world could be if more of us were peacemakers—building bridges of understanding rather than walls of prejudice—especially with those who may see the world differently than we do. I have seen bitter divisions soften when neighbors chose to listen to one another with respect rather than suspicion. Even small acts—like reaching out across lines of faith, culture, or politics—can open doors to healing. There is power in affording others the human dignity that all of God’s children deserve.  

This work begins at home. At a time when loneliness and isolation are rising around the world, families—though never perfect—remain one of life’s strongest sources of stability and meaning. My own experience has taught me that fidelity, forgiveness, and faithfulness within families yield deep, enduring peace. Strong families help us extend kindness outward, reinforcing communities and societies as well."

So, there it is. We can each be part of the solution. We can each start within our small spheres of influence - beginning right at home among those we should love the most. When differences arise - and they will - take a deep breath, count to ten, look for the good in those around you, and love one another. One drop of kindness, one moment of empathy and understanding, one loving thought, word or action at a time - You guys, we can DO this!!! We can change the world, we can be peacemakers, we CAN love one another!

Life, Times, and Challenges...

 Dear Family and Friends;

Kevin and I wanted to give you all an update on the latest development in Kevin's health.

In December, blood work from a routine physical showed indications that something was wrong with Kevin's prostate gland. Over the last two months, he has undergone ultrasounds, MRI's with contrast, biopsies, and a PET scan. The final diagnosis is that Kevin has stage 3 prostate cancer that has spread to several of the lymph nodes in the pelvic region. The good news is that it has not spread anywhere else in his body.

This type of cancer feeds on testosterone, so the first step in Kevin's treatment is hormone therapy to lower his testosterone levels. He began the first medication for that treatment last week. Over the next 6 weeks, he will add another medication to boost the first. After a couple of months, if tests show that the prostate and the cancer in it has shrunk, Kevin will undergo radiation therapy. This will be location specific, so not as invasive.

After an initial pity-party – I mean, have you SEEN Kevin???

He's “Mr. Healthy and Fit”!!! This diagnosis was pretty lowering for both of us. We definitely did NOT see this coming – but, we are at peace. We know – without a doubt – that Heavenly Father has a plan for Kevin. We know there are things we're supposed to learn from this challenge that Heavenly Father has entrusted to us. We're eager to learn and be taught so we can grow and progress. We have faith in the Lord's plan and in the treatment Kevin is receiving. Trust in our Savior, Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father will help us through this.

We'll keep you posted as things progress. Kevin is still going to work, working out at the gym (it helps with his mental health as well as physically), and being steadfast in his Church assignments. It's Kevin... how could you expect anything else?

Your prayers and positive thoughts are more than welcome. Thank you all for your love and friendship. They add flavor and joy to our lives.

All our love,

Kevin & Annette

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Christmas ponderings

The last few weeks have found me pondering the reasons we even have this “most wonderful time of the year”. I began thinking of the Nativity – the “Greatest Story Ever Told” - and in those moments, the participants in this story jumped into my thoughts.

I thought of Joseph. He who was chosen to be the earthly father for the Father's Only Begotten Son. He was so faithful and obedient. When the angel told him not to put Mary away, he didn't question or remind the angel about the whispers and gossip that must surely have surrounded their situation. No, Joseph simply “did as the angel...had bidden him”. I reflected on that long journey and the trying circumstances of traveling with his wife in what to him must have been a worrying situation. 

Then to FINALLY get where they were going, only to NOT be able to find any accommodations. He must have been SO concerned for Mary and the baby she was soon to deliver. I imagined Joseph going into that stable and looking at the animals and all the mess, dirt, and debris that come with them. I can imagine him looking to Heaven and saying “This??? This is where You want us to bring Your Son, our Messiah into the world???” But, as he had in response to the angel – Joseph did what was right and set about making the best of what they had to work with. I imagine him raking out the old straw and putting down fresh. I imagine him cleaning out that manger and lining it with fresh, clean hay, and clean soft bedding. Steady, faithful, loving, and obedient – that was Joseph.

I wonder at Mary...so young, but so valiant, faithful, and obedient. When presented with her divine mission to be the earthly mother of the Messiah, she asked one question. When given the answer, she humbly and meekly submitted to the will of the Father - “Be it unto me, according to thy word” tells us so much about who Mary was. 

I can't even imagine how hard that journey to Bethlehem was for a young woman who was 9 months pregnant. Then knowing the baby was coming right away, and not being able to find a place to stay... I can only imagine what must have been going through her mind and heart. But Mary trusted Joseph, and they both trusted the Father. Though humble and lowly, a place was provided “and she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger...”

Then there was the angel appearing to the shepherds. Out in the dark, quiet, lonely countryside, those humble shepherds tended their flocks. 

That same Heavenly messenger appeared so he could “bring good tidings of great joy!” and gave them the good news!

I imagine that single messenger from Heaven would have given those shepherds something to marvel about if he'd been the only one to show up. But suddenly – SUDDENLY! A multitude of the heavenly host was with him. I imagine that heavenly host – maybe even some of us in our pre-mortal life – not being able to hold back their joy and singing glory to God and peace on earth!!! What a joyful noise!!! 

With their departure, those awe-struck shepherds went with “haste” and witnessed the baby – their Messiah – just as the angel had said. And seeing, believed and bore witness.

All these individuals were simply going about their lives. Lives that might never have intersected but for one thing. Heavenly Father had a plan, and they each had a part to play in that plan. A part of the Greatest Story Ever Told... The birth of a baby.

Not just any baby – their God – the Lord Jehovah, descended from His Heavenly throne to be born in a lowly stable – to be cradled in a feeding trough. Why? So He could save them – so He could save US! He, who was the greatest of all descended below all things. And He continues today. Because He meets us where we are and HOW we are. He comes to change the lowliest and most broken hearts. And heal the deepest and most devastating wounds.

I testify that as He did with the participants of the Nativity, Heavenly Father has a plan for each of us. He has a path laid out before us that simply requires our obedient submission to His will. He will lead us and show us the way – just as He did all those years ago with a young girl, a carpenter, and some humble shepherds. I bear my witness that the Lord of Heaven came to earth to reach the lowliest and most broken; to lift them up to the greatest heights and bring them home to Celestial glory. All He requires is our broken and humble hearts, and our willing obedience. As we give those gifts to Him, we each become participants in “The Greatest Story Ever told”. I testify that Jesus Christ is the light and the life of this world. He lives and loves each of us – just as we are and where we are.

Merry Christmas with all our love and best wishes for a safe and blessed New Year!

Love,

Annette & Kevin 

Jesus Christ is the Treasure...

 Several months ago, I was asked to speak in our Ward's Sacrament meeting. I have been meaning to share it here, but haven't felt the time was right, until now. With this being Easter week, I am trying to focus on my beloved Savior, Jesus Christ and all He's done for me - culminating in His great Atoning Sacrifice and Resurrection. I owe Him everything and love Him beyond the words to express it. Here is my talk entitled: Jesus Christ is the Treasure, based on Elder Dale G. Renlund's talk of the same title: 

"Good afternoon, Sisters and Brothers. I have been asked to speak to you today using Elder Dale G. Renlund's talk in this month's General Conference, as a reference. His talk is entitled: Jesus Christ is the Treasure.

Elder Renlund begins his remarks with the story of the discovery of the tomb of King Tutankhamun in Egypt. After digging in the Valley of the Kings, unsuccessfully for five years, the explorers finally realized that they had not searched in the location of their base camp. After a few days of digging in that new spot, they discovered the tomb they were looking for. Literally, the treasure was right under their feet all along. They missed it because they were looking “beyond the mark”.

Elder Renlund explains that this phrase: “Looking beyond the mark” was how the Book of Mormon prophet Jacob referred to taking for granted or undervaluing what is nearby. He said that Jacob prophesied that when our Savior, Jesus Christ came to the people at Jerusalem, they would not recognize Him as the promised Messiah. And he was right. The people at Jerusalem didn't see what or who was right in front of them. Instead, they rejected Him, mocked Him, and finally – they crucified Him. In vain, they continued looking for someone else to save them.

Elder Renlund said: “Like those people in Jerusalem...we too can be prone to look beyond the mark. We need to guard against this tendency lest we miss Jesus Christ in our lives and fail to recognize the many blessings He offers us. We need Him. We are counseled to rely 'wholly upon the merits of him who is mighty to save.'

He is our mark. If we incorrectly imagine that there is a need for something beyond what He offers, we deny or diminish the scope and power He can have in our lives.

Jesus Christ is our treasure.”

I remember a time in my life where I missed what was right in front of me until Heavenly Father took that opportunity to teach me a life-changing lesson.

Just to give you a little background to this story... In addition to some abdominal health issues I'm currently having; that the doctors haven't figured out yet - I have an auto-immune disease called “Sarcoidosis”. It's a disease which causes abnormal collections of inflammatory cells called granuloma. It can affect every organ in the body. It causes inflammation, flu-like feverishness, pain, and dragging fatigue. There is no explanation for what causes it. There is no cure. It can go into remission (which mine did until 2019). It can reoccur (which mine has). It can last a few years or long-term. It can also be fatal.

There's rarely a day when I am not in pain somewhere. I know this sounds like I'm a big whiner, but I am honestly trying not to be. This is simply my daily life with active Sarcoidosis and it's exhausting. It's as if your body is at war with itself.

In spite of all this, I try really hard to keep a positive attitude and a cheerful countenance. For the most part, I succeed. Sometimes, however, when the flare-ups seem never-ending; I get worn down and discouraged. On those days, the effort to keep trying seems over-whelming. On those days, I just want to quit and go home to Heavenly Father. I'm very grateful that those days are rare.

All that being said, I'm not having a “pity-party”. It's just that this is hard. Hurting all the time saps your strength and energy. I don't want to be that person who puts themselves to bed every time they have a hangnail. (I'm exaggerating...) But really, I want to muscle through this and do as much as I can - as cheerfully as I can. I especially don't want to be a crabby-sick-person.

I am learning to let go of things I can't do and not despair over them – and hope that someday I'll be able to do those things again. I am being taught to embrace the victories as they come. I am learning to focus on the joy Heavenly Father showers down on me each day. It may not be the joy I asked for, but it is joy! I am being taught – tutored or polished, if you will – to see that God can make so much more of me than I could ever make of myself.

I'm not there yet, but someday I hope to be able to embrace this polishing with a cheerful heart and no whining. In the meantime, I am grateful that Heavenly Father is patient with me when I am not so patient with His plan. I keep trying to alter the blueprints and He keeps lovingly steering me back on course. I am also infinitely grateful for a God who must have a wondrously perfect sense of humor. I hope my clumsiness in fumbling my way along this path gives Him more to chuckle at and less of a desire to hurl lightning bolts to zap me with.

I am beyond grateful for the love and support of my dear husband. He does so much for me – mostly, he doesn't see me as disabled or handicapped. He sees me – into the heart of me. I love how he loves me and I try to do whatever I can to make this challenge easier for him. Awhile ago, I had an idea of something new I could do that might help lighten Kevin's load...

So I tried something new and it didn't work the way I planned. The way I planned... I was so disappointed. I cried in frustration and anger. I felt broken, lost, defective, and useless. I stood below, shaking my fist at Heaven – railing at the failure of my plan. My plan... totally forgetting that I am committed to living HIS plan. It didn't last long – this anger and frustration. For me, it rarely does. Heavenly Father is perfect and sees everything. I KNOW I need to trust that but being a flawed and imperfect human; I lose sight of that occasionally. I am beyond grateful for a patient, loving Father who waits for me to get it out of my system and come back around...then with a loving hand on my shoulder He guides me where I need to go.

It wasn't a total loss – as usual, Heavenly Father turns my failings into opportunities to teach me. This experience made me ponder about my relationship with Him. I began thinking of how He dealt with the people we read about in the scriptures. Suddenly I was seeing them in a new-personal way. As I thought about who I am to our Heavenly Father, I could see myself in their stories.

I am Ruth. In the early days of our marriage, I promised my husband that I would go with him where ever Heavenly Father took us. So, I did - “...for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God...”

As life didn't follow the course I thought it would, I became Esther. In discovering how to follow the path Heavenly Father was leading me to, I learned to ask myself: “who knoweth whether thou art come to the kingdom for such a time as this?” The Lord has a purpose for me – trusting Him to show me that purpose is a life-long pursuit.

I am the woman with the issue of blood, reaching out to the Savior for healing – hoping...hoping...hoping...

I am Sarah, and Elizabeth feeling alone in my barrenness; longing for children who seem to never come. Feeling defective and less-than. Until God's mercy smiled upon me as it had them and I, like my scriptural-sisters, embraced the joy of motherhood.

I am the woman at the well, discovering the “gift of God” and “Living Water”, our Treasure. He who knows “all things that I ever did” and learning the answer to the question “...is not this the Christ?”

I am Peter – when I'm full of enthusiasm and the Spirit – ready to jump out of the boat and run on the water to Jesus. Then life gets “boisterous”, and I get in over my head. Suddenly I'm crying out, “Lord, save me!” Always He stretches forth His hand and catches me despite of my “little faith”

I'm Lehi and Sariah at the Tree of life, souls filled with “exceedingly great joy” and wanting to share it with loved ones. Standing bereft as beloved children “would not come...and partake...”.

I am Joseph, walking into what will soon become a sacred grove... Reading that story of a boy who was not much older than I, when I first read of him. He like I, “lacked wisdom”. He like I, found the faith to ask “the” question. For me, the seeds of my testimony were sown in my reading of Joseph and the answer to HIS prayer. “This is My Beloved Son. Hear Him!”

Even as I liken the scriptures to myself, I am making my own record. This is MY path – my unique journey. Heavenly Father knows what I need and how I must progress. So, taking strength from my scriptural-friends and the lessons they teach me; I continue writing my story - day by day. Noting the times when I'm swamped with love and joy for God's grace and goodness to me. As well as the times when I feel desolate, down-trodden, put-upon, and used up. Times when the only thing holding me up is the touch of the Master's hand, His love, His kindness, and His mercy. I think of the widow woman who by obeying the prophet Elijah one day, had enough food for days to come. It reminds me to trust that God's goodness can be enough to get me through today, and tomorrow it will be enough again. It teaches me to trust that “Surely as I (God) have thought, so shall it come to pass...” Isaiah 14:24... God always keeps His promises and He will never lead me astray.

I tried something new, and it didn't work because I was following the wrong plan, or looking beyond the mark. I tried something new and failed, but not really. Because my loving Father took my hand and led me through a lesson that showed me a better glimpse of His plan. He showed me that He can teach me valuable truths and use me to bless others – even when I feel broken, lost, defective, and useless. Because to Him, I am none of those things. To Heavenly Father, I am like the Apostle John in the scriptures. I am “Beloved.”

I testify of the truthfulness of these things. I testify that Jesus Christ is our beloved Savior. He suffered for our sins and all the other hard things we must endure in this life. He did this so that we can repent, change, and be His disciples. He did this so He could perfectly succor us, be our advocate with our Father, and be our 'kind, wise, Heavenly friend'. If you have a problem, question, concern, pain, grief, sorrow, regret, or just need love – I testify that Jesus Christ is always the answer – He is our treasure. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Confidence...

 Years ago, Kevin and I were blessed to have a sweet, humble, loving home teacher named Jaime Jennings. During one visit, Brother Jennings said something that completely changed our lives. 

At this particular time, things in our extended family were in a little bit of chaos. We had family members going through some serious trials that were SO difficult. In addition to these, Kevin was just recovering from a systemic infection that had taken weeks to get over. Dear Brother Jennings asked how we were doing, and Kevin just unloaded all over him with the issues facing us and our loved ones. After the diatribe was over, Brother Jennings asked if he could offer a prayer for us. In this prayer, Brother Jennings said, "Dear Heavenly Father, we thank Thee that Thou hast trusted the Websters with these challenges..."

  

Wait! What?!?!?! That idea that Father was TRUSTING us with these trials just stopped us in our tracks! We knew that the difficult circumstances we encountered in our lives were learning experiences whose lessons could shape and refine us. But the idea that Heavenly Father was entrusting us with these experiences because He knew that we were ready to learn what He had to teach us, put us in partnership with God... It changed everything about how we approach trials in our lives.

  

Fast forward to now and we're facing a different set of challenges. My ongoing health issues are a trial with seemingly no end in sight. It is hard, exhausting, and often heart-breaking. Still, we know without a doubt that Heavenly Father has a plan for us and we are trusting Him to help us navigate our way through this.

Our Savior knows that life is hard. He knows exactly what we are each enduring in our lives because He lived it in our behalf during His great Atoning Sacrifice. More than anyone else in our lives, Jesus Christ "gets it"!!! Elder Dale G. Renlund of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said: "Jesus loves you, and He has confidence in you, and you can have confidence in Him." When I recently read that quote, it took me right back to dear Brother Jennings and his life-changing prayer. If Heavenly Father is trusting us with the challenges we face in life, of COURSE Jesus has confidence in us. Since He endured all the challenges we face in life, and knows perfectly how to help us navigate through them - then of COURSE we can have confidence in Him!

 

All of these thoughts have brought me so much comfort and peace. Maybe it's that misery does indeed love company, but it helps to know that we're not in this alone. Our loving Heavenly Father and our Savior, Jesus Christ are walking with us, every step of the way. With such a celestial support-system, how can we not have the courage to walk the path they've set before us with faith and confidence in Them; in every footstep?